Learn to live when people leave
Life is connections—that last lifetime or perhaps just a few days. We build relationships, share memories, and shape our lives around people who matter. Sometimes they leave, and we’re left wriggling with a hole, left with the question of how to begin again. The breakup of a friendship, break-up or the death of someone, learning how to stay alive when people leave makes all the difference in one’s growth and resilience.
Acknowledge the Pain
Acknowledge your feelings. No matter how it is done, people sometimes leave. You are naturally going to be hurt, confused, or abandoned. Many of us will try to turn off feelings by doing something else or by saying that everything is okay. The most important thing that begins the healing process is honesty. Feel free to grieve this loss-it's okay to be vulnerable.
Come to Accept That Things Change
One of the truths about life is that change is bound to happen. People are always changing, circumstances change, and sometimes, the reasons for a relationship may also outgrow its purpose. Holding onto something no longer serving you can hold you back. Not all connections are for forever. The idea that people come into your life for a season rather than a lifetime does not help with itself in bringing clarity and peace.
Change Your Mindset: Grow
Every time a person leaves, you have the opportunity to grow. Instead of focusing on the empty space they left behind, try to think about how you can grow from the experience. Ask yourself:
What did this relationship teach me?
How can I grow from this?
It hurts to let someone walk out of your life, but that sometimes readies you for parts of yourself that you never knew existed. This could be the perfect time to rekindle the things that excite you, improve parts of your character, or focus on personal goals. Growth happens most dramatically when we face challenges.
Create a Support System
Loss makes people feel alone, but you need not lose your way here. Try to connect with friends and family members or a support group who would help you listen to you and guide you through the tough times. It is good to have a well-structured support system that reminds you that you are not alone during this time. Talking to someone who understands you gives you more relief and perspective sometimes.
Be able to Let Go
Letting go doesn't mean you forget the connection or disown its impact upon your life, but rather letting go of the binding emotional hold that doesn't let go. Whatever it is, whether anger or unresolved issues, holding onto it can be a bottle-neck to truly letting go. Letting go is a kind of self-care-it is drawing in your peace of mind and making room for new experiences and relationships.
Invest in Yourself
The hours and energy you used to pour into that person? Now, you can invest in self-growth. Perhaps now is the time for that passion project, learning a new skill, or just generally doing more of what makes you happy. You heal as you create a richer, fuller life with yourself, independent of others.
Be Grateful for What Was
It may be tough, but try to be thankful for the relationship you once had. Every person who comes into your life becomes part of who you are. Be grateful for the lessons they brought, the joy they shared, and the memories you have with them. Practicing gratitude can shift your focus from loss to appreciation, making it a less painful process moving forward.
Create New Connections
Once you have healed enough, let out your arms to new relationships. People leave, but you always get new people. New relationships do not mean that you are replacing your old ones; it means that there is always social and emotional development.
You bring a little wisdom and experience of your past relationships to every new connection you make.
Enjoy solitude
One of the most precious gifts you can give yourself after someone leaves is learning to enjoy your own company. Solitude is not loneliness. That is when and how you can reconnect with yourself, understand all of your desires, and nourish the inner peace of your soul. When you learn to be content with who you are, the departure of others won't shake your foundation.
The Road Ahead
Life becomes a lot about learning to live when people leave you, that takes time and patience with great doses of self-compassion. If not overnight, it will pass by, and you would, of course, be coming out stronger, wiser, and more resilient. In any case, remember, life is always full of transitions, and every ending signals the beginning of something else.
With growth, you would continue to nurture your inner self and create a life that is not dependent on others, and so, you can thrive even with loss. Let the departure of others become a trigger for your transformation into the best version of yourself.
